The solution is fairly simple but not necessarily easy.
“What I see happening, downsizing and aging is a bit of a taboo topic,” said Grant. “Have a good plan in place around 65 that you are going to stick to and be accountable to your family members.”
That is a broad strokes plan sharing the elder’s wishes and setting goals.
“At 70-75, you might have the cognitive capacity to do it but not the physical capacity to do it yourself. The brain power to do all the packing or getting to know a new area is underestimated. It has to happen before your abilities decline and the burden shifts to adult children.”
This also empowers the elder, rather than forcing decisions on them – another stress for the family, he said.
“My mission is to get people to start talking about this. The conversations are getting delayed. Be honest, be transparent and commit to the plan of aging. Acknowledge there is a functional decline with aging without any particular health condition.”
Connecting the dots
With the experience of working within and out of Coastal Health, Grant understands the pressures and limitations of the public system. He hopes Living By Design helps families move forward with living and aging. Too often, after a brief evaluation from a Coastal Health OT patients are left with more questions than answers.
“When people leave it to a crisis: like they are in hospital after they have fallen and broken their hip, suddenly they need an accessible home. People spend a lot of time in rehab only to find their home is not appropriate for them,” said Grant. “OTs with Coastal Health are stretched too thin. They will say you need an accessible bathroom but they don’t have time to tell you what that means and how you can get it. We are trying to fill the gaps in what the public system can offer. They can’t go into this much detail, they will do a basic assessment, but I will do a much more detailed assessment and treatment.”
Whether it’s a crisis, a disability or managing the general decline of aging, if a home needs renovation, that is Melody’s specialty. Her skills help make the functional changes homey and aesthetically pleasing.
“Often people get recommendations but there is no one to help with the next step of implementing them,” he said. “It might be adding some grab bars but it might be renovating their whole bathroom and they are left to their own devices to figure it out.
“You can’t rush a lot of these things – it takes time finding contractors, supplies. Ideally, it should be done ahead of time step-by-step.”
If adult children are out of town, or if that process is simply too taxing, Living By Design can help homeowners through the process.
“One thing I think might be very helpful is project management,” said Grant. “If you need changes but you might not have the knowledge or the energy to call and make those changes. Melody can help organize reliable trades, keep them on track and make them accountable. The burden often falls on the children who might not even live in the area. If your spouse previously looked after these responsibilities and they have recently passed, it can be intimidating to talk to a contractor and makes them vulnerable to being taken advantage of.”
The first steps to aging in place are simple conversations and assessments, said Grant. He evaluates over 300 potential hazards in the home and can also establish a cognitive baseline to monitor mental changes.
“If someone thinks ‘We are slowing down and we want to make some changes,’ we can do a joint assessment and look at the space planning and we can work together.”
Living By Design is based in Lynn Valley and works throughout the North Shore and Sunshine Coast.